May
11

A Hemp Diet

“Why make a category for everything? The world lives on the brink of destruction, people are as apathetic as ever, and chronological whimsical forms of the structure are the things that are keeping us down. Fuck the system, Fuck the structure, and BY GOD here at Stoner Schematics we say FUCK Categories (…sometimes).”

hemp seeds

Besides used for medicinal purposes, the cannabis plant can also be a basis for a healthy diet among many other things. For instance, hemp seeds contain essential amino acids and fatty acids necessary for a healthy diet. About a third of the weight of the seed is made up of oil, and most of that oil is the healthy variety: ALA (alpha-linoleic acid, a type of Omega-3 fat) and linoleic acid. Seeds can be consumed raw, ground up, made into milk/tea, or can be used in baking. People all around the globe incorporate hemp products in a number of their daily diets, and have many different recipes for preparing them.

hemp milk

Here in the U.S., hemp seeds can be imported but not grown due to the illegalization of all things cannabis. Still, as awareness of hemp reaches out to the broader American market, more and more hemp products are appearing in local grocery stores. For instance, Living Harvest offers hemp milk, oil, non-dairy frozen deserts, and even ice cream bars. They even offer several flavors of milk, providing more choices for those of us who are lactose intolerant. Their costs for the milk are $4.24 for a single 32 oz., or $46.55 for a twelve pack.

hemp granola

To go along with that tasty hemp milk, you could also pick up some nutritious hemp granola from Nature’s Path Organic. Their batch of granola includes: “A crunchy, combination of toasted oats, rice crisps, and nutritionally rich hemp seeds that add omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids, as well as extra protein and fiber. A good source of dietary fiber with 4 grams per serving.” You can pick up an 11.5 oz. box of their granola for $4.59 or a twelve pack for $50.08.

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May
01

Tame Impala- Expectations

“Hippies and flower children of the 60’s would always describe one sick beat of any nature as being “Groovy” or “Far out”. We feel the same way. It doesn’t matter if it’s guitar, bass, violin, piano, ukulele, anything! This is the beats that intoxicate our brains, blow our minds, and really send us …well… Far out man.”
—-> Got suggestions for music? E-mail Pistachio or E-mail Dignan

I featured some of tame Impala’s music here a while ago, and recently I’ve been listening to them alot. “Expectations” is a great song from their latest album, Innerspeaker. If you’ve never heard them before, definitely check them out because this album is one you’ll be hooked onto for awhile. I do not think there was a single song that I didn’t like on the album. Other great tracks from the album include: “It’s Not Meant to be,” “Desire Be Desire Go,” and “Lucidity.” Try out some of the sample tracks on the Innerspeaker link, I doubt you’ll be disappointed with what you hear.

If you have any musicians who you think should be featured, just send us a link to their page! We here at Stonerschematics.com are always looking for new and upcoming musicians with great new music. Help us get the word out about your favorite bands!

tame impala innerspeaker cover

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Apr
25

Stoner Sliders

“Half-baked is probably one if not the greatest Stoner movies of all time and we believe this category is best summed up by the great, talented, and verbose Jon Stewart.
Enhancement Smoker (Jon Stewart): “Did you ever see Scent of a Woman?”
Scarface: “Yup.”
Enhancement Smoker: “You ever seen Scent of a Woman… on weed? That’s the way to see it. It’s just wacked.”
That is what this is, high movies or shows. Not necessarily ratings or anything like that, but movies or shows… well … high.”
——> Got suggestions for movies or shows? E-mail Pistachio or E-mail Dignan

Tommy Chong

I was watching an episode of Sliders today and happened to run into two famous stoners, Tommy Chong and Danny Masterson. If you are unfamiliar with Sliders, its a Sci-fi show that aired a few years ago where the characters are stuck “sliding” or traveling around different parallel universes trying to return to their home dimension. This particular episode (season 3: episode 24 – Stoker) introduces Tommy Chong as a Van Helsing-like vampire hunter who is helping Quinn, the main character of the show, rescue one of his friends from the clutches of a Vampire rock band who want to turn her into one of their own. Tommy Chong’s name is featured as one of the top cast members on the Netflix description of the Sliders series, so It was only a matter of time until he showed up somewhere.

Danny Masterson

Danny Masterson, aka Hyde from That 70’s Show, also makes an appearance on the very same episode of sliders. However, Masterson plays the part of a Vampire groupie looking to earn his way into the ranks of the undead rockers. It was a nice bonus to have both of these cool cats make cameo appearances in one episode together. Be sure to check out this episode on Netflix.

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Apr
18

Whatever Happened to Laurie Forman?

“Half-baked is probably one if not the greatest Stoner movies of all time and we believe this category is best summed up by the great, talented, and verbose Jon Stewart.
Enhancement Smoker (Jon Stewart): “Did you ever see Scent of a Woman?”
Scarface: “Yup.”
Enhancement Smoker: “You ever seen Scent of a Woman… on weed? That’s the way to see it. It’s just wacked.”
That is what this is, high movies or shows. Not necessarily ratings or anything like that, but movies or shows… well … high.”
——> Got suggestions for movies or shows? E-mail Pistachio or E-mail Dignan

laurie that 70s show

Ever wonder where Laurie from That 70’s Show ended up? Apparently, after she dropped off the show in 2003 (season 3) she disappeared for awhile to return briefly in season 5 before being replaced. Lisa Robin Kelly, the woman behind the infamous Laurie Forman, fell into a little trouble of her own after her time on the show. In August of 2010, she was arrested on a DUI charge in North Carolina and spent the night of the 21st in jail before she was released on bail. Kelly plead guilty to driving while intoxicated and received 12 months of probation in addition to fines. Below is a shot of the now 40 year-old former actress; obviously she has changed a lot from her glory days as Eric Forman’s older sister.

laurie mug shot

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Apr
12

Chronic Jerky

“Why make a category for everything? The world lives on the brink of destruction, people are as apathetic as ever, and chronological whimsical forms of the structure are the things that are keeping us down. Fuck the system, Fuck the structure, and BY GOD here at Stoner Schematics we say FUCK Categories (…sometimes).”

chronic jerky

I don’t know about you, but I love beef jerky. Its the perfect snack on the road, and contains loads of protein to keep you going. Now imagine my surprise when I found out that there is a place that sells beef jerky named after different types of cannabis. Among their offered flavors are: Original Crypto, Black Peppered Kush, Spicy Red Hair, Sticki-Icki Teriyaki, Smoked Out Hickory, and Sweet and Spicy Thai Stick. I love spicy jerky, so I ordered myself some of the Spicy Red Hair. The site doesn’t exactly specify how much jerky you get for their price of $7.99, but at that price point, I’m guessing that its a quarter pound of jerky. With shipping and handling at $2.95, the total for one order of jerky weighs in at $10.94. When I get my order, I’ll be sure to taste test it for you guys and report back to you if its worth it or not. Check out the site here.

original crypto
black peppered kush
spicy red hair
stiki iki teriyaki
smoked out hickory
thai stick

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