Feb
25

Marijuana ASAP

“Why make a category for everything? The world lives on the brink of destruction, people are as apathetic as ever, and chronological whimsical forms of the structure are the things that are keeping us down. Fuck the system, Fuck the structure, and BY GOD here at Stoner Schematics we say FUCK Categories (…sometimes).”

What is actually occurring in your brain when you smoke cannabis? This question is the central theme of the video above, “Your Brain on Drugs: Marijuana,” created by AsapScience, a YouTube Channel dedicated to addressing a new, user-submitted, scientific question each week. For Asap, the answer lies in the psychological, physiological, and fundamental composition of the brain. Any movement, hormone adjustment, or function of the brain is carried out by electrical signals, which are passed between the axon of one neuron and the dendrite of another through chemicals known as neurotransmitters. Essentially, if the neuron is excited by the signal, then it proceeds to pass it down the line to complete the action, but if it is inhibited, the signal stops, ceasing further neuroactivity on that chain.

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Feb
23

One High Pilot

“It is a widely accepted fact that cannabis (…and other great hallucinogens) have been linked numerous times to allowing people everywhere; from writers, to artists, and even amongst the most advent doodlers as being a smooth gateway to better and more insightful pieces of art. So take your brush of choice and blow some minds… this is Stoner Art.”

armandingo high pilot

Today’s submission of Stoner Art on Stoner Schematics comes from a contributor to the subreddit, Baked Art, by the name of Armandingo. The high pilot above first caught my eyes as I gazed upon the assortment of artistic pieces cataloged by Armandingo. Remaining in black and white, the sketch utilizes slight variations in shadowing and highlighting to mimic the hazy smoke escaping the cannabis consuming converted respirator. Like the smoke, the portrait leaps off the page due to the selective use of diagonal strokes on the back of the pilot’s chair leading the observer’s eye frantically down to the pilot’s intricately carved jumpsuit featuring crosshatching to center the viewer’s attention. The pilot appears to be perched in the middle of a deep trance, concentrating on the task at hand as he takes a long draw with the same intensity he brings to breaking the sound barrier, enduring high-g turns, and withstanding heavy fire without resorting to pulling the handle to eject, all while saving an aftermath pack of smokes and a stash of sweet cheeba. No, this pilot did not fantasize about being called “Maverick” to fulfill some childhood silver screen delusion; rather, he became a pilot to experience the moment when time stops, when life and death becomes inconsequential, the terrifying sacrifice of trading bipedalism for flight.

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Feb
20

The Flower PSA

“Half-baked is one if not the greatest Stoner movies of all time and we believe this category is best summed up by the great, talented, and verbose Jon Stewart.
Enhancement Smoker (Jon Stewart): ‘Did you ever see Scent of a Woman?’
Scarface: ‘Yup.’
Enhancement Smoker: ‘You ever seen Scent of a Woman… on weed? That’s the way to see it. It’s just wacked.’
This category attempts to capture the Enhancement essence, not necessarily ratings or anything like that, but movies, shows, or videos… well… high.”
——> Got suggestions for movies or shows? E-mail Dignan

What is cannabis but a harmless flower? This is the question the Public Service Announcement above called “The Flower,” created by Blackmustache studios in collaboration with music and sound designer Ion Furjani, asks in order to change the perspective on marijuana prohibition. The video begins in a vibrant and colorful Utopia, where upon finding a flower that when inhaled alters people to happier states of mind, a gentleman shares the flower with the people of his sunny world. Upon distributing the flower, some people accept its abilities, some are unaffected, and others simply pass it along to another recipient without complaint. Industrialization of the flower occurs. They grow the flowers on farms, cut them into bunches, package, and sell them at retail prices for everyone to enjoy. Not only does the businessman benefit, but the manufacturer does as well. Couples do not quarrel as much with the flower, patients are given alternative and holistic flowers for their ailments, and profit from taxes creates a thriving government, which in turn proliferates a shining society.

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Feb
17

Gardening with Snoop Dogg

“Ever since the first human being gazed upon the magnificence that is marijuana, we have been infatuated with domesticating and reproducing the effects of natural propagation to yield higher amounts of cannabinoids. While planting a seed in the ground may seem easy at first, pH balances, nutrient regimens, watering schedules, light cycles, and other yield mitigating factors can actually create a convoluted, complex, and rather scientific endeavor. Therefore, Growing Green is a category dedicated to unraveling these tortuous obstacles to provide you with thriving and sprouting success as you proliferate pot.”

snoop smoking

Today is a special day for Stoner Schematics as we unveil the new category, Growing Green. As the description above attempts to explain, Growing Green will be a category that will dedicate itself to demystifying growing marijuana for the most novel abecedarian. While many of the future articles will specifically focus on growing techniques, maintaining adequate conditions, and purchasing necessary products for propagation, some posts in this category, as with the first one, will simply aim to get the discussion around growing going, as it is still somewhat taboo. In order to demonstrate this concept, check out the video below on Snoop Lion’s, Snoop Dogg at the time, visit to Cardiff, the capital of Wales, to meet Ian Neale the Guinness World Record holder of the world’s largest Swede, or rutabaga, at 85.5 pounds.

While Ian Neale may seem like a jolly old fella who enjoys meeting Snoop Dogg backstage for his first smoke session ever, he is in fact a master of his craft. In a recent interview with the Wales News Service, Neale revealed that he has been growing vegetables for over 30 years, beginning with a competition with his friend over who could grow the biggest onion. He has grown 52 pound celery, 51.5 pound beetroot, and he has held multiple titles including world record for heaviest turnip. Growing takes great dedication, and Neale epitomizes the hard-working farmer, despite his dominance of the size market, by continuing to work over 70 hours per week. For him, the job is never over, and there is always another vegetable show right around the corner. Whether it is rutabagas or cannabis, growing vegetables or herbs can be a difficult task that takes years of practice, persistence, and patience to become an adept practitioner. Therefore, we should all start small, but start now to get some experience, and before too long, we will overgrow the world.

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Feb
15

Blumenauer for Rescheduling Cannabis

“Everything around us is changing… laws, society, personal idiosyncrasies, as well as the realm that cannabis resides. Sometimes it is time to sit down the bowl and really focus on the issues… well then pick it back up because politics are stressful…”

pineapple legalization

Recently, as of February 12th, 18 bipartisan congressmen underneath the direction of Representative Earl Blumenauer, the Democratic candidate for the House from Oregon, submitted a succinct petition to Barack Obama and the White House calling for Obama to direct Attorney General Eric Holder to reschedule marijuana from Schedule I of the Controlled Substances Act to a less severe and non-threatening level as per 21 U.S.C. ยง 811. At its current level, the federal sanction of cannabis as a Schedule I substance lumps marijuana into the same category as heroin, LSD, and other intense hallucinogenic, psychotropic drugs, which are not considered to have any recognized medicinal benefits, regardless of the myriad of favorable studies in a variety of states and nations. Essentially, rescheduling can occur through a variety of forms including the Attorney General, a unilateral executive decision, or legislation through Congress, and this letter attempts to cater to all of these methods.

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